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It’s back, the feature in where I share all that is virtuous, lovely or of good report in my wandering to cyberspace.  I may have complained that I am sick of it in my last post but I am over that now.  Please disregard it, which I leave only as a reminder to me and warning to others about what happens when certain medications are stopped or skipped.   Instead, turn yourself to the very best of the past week in the Internet- Read the rest of this entry »

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(A note- Please don’t worry, I am not psychotic, not really hearing voices.  I am just referring to the automatic thoughts and inward conversation we all have, even when we are unaware that we are doing it.)

I am starting to feel it now.  I am tired.

I am tired of politics.  I am tired of people talking at other people.  I am tired of trying to reach the unreachable.  I am tired of doing things I usually enjoy.  This is the world of depression and I fear it is creeping back. I am tired of blog shouting matches.  I am tired of others condemning others who condemn them back.  I am tired of man’s inhumanity to man.  I am tired of writing.  I even sucked the joy out of the Olympics in my last post.  I am tired of fear and its ugly effect on people.  I am tired of writing.  I am tired of trying to wrestle out the beautiful, praiseworthy, and good report out of what I find, what I read, and what I write. 

   The voice is getting loud.  The voice is a pessimist.  It finds fault with anything I do.  I can’t write anything because it will not be good enough.  There is nothing worth writing.  There is just weariness.   A while back John D. at storied mind wrote about how creativity has at times burst him out of depression.  All I feel right now is depression stamping out creativity. 

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